Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Oh...what the F$@!*?

Lets jump into our time machines and go to yearbook picture day, last year.
My buddy Robbie and I always like to do something special. We had just won our first RECYouth award and thought it would be cool to have it pictured in the yearbook with us. Easy.
Well, no. It's my turn and the photographer says to me "You can't have any props in the photo". I, puzzled, said "No it's O.K, don't worry about it, just take the photo". She gets mad. "SIR YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY PROPS IN THE PHOTO". I get mad. "LISTEN, LADY, I'M PAYING $60 FOR THIS AND I'M GETTING MY GODDAMNED PROP IN THIS PHOTO". She counts the money and says "...Sir you are only buying the $40 dollar package". This, of all comments made me the angriest. "only" 40 dollars? Sweetheart, 40 dollars can get me a bottle of champagne at the Raj, some scratch off cards, a cab up to my girlfriend's house and a back massage. "Just", just won't describe it.
Now, I will admit. How I handled the situation was a little innapropriate. I yelled something along the lines of "oh, well shit, only $40 dollars? People line their panties with that. You are not a photographer. You are a mean, cold bitch" as I tossed the trophy aside. She told me to smile. I did. Big. FLASH. I leave, making sure she hears every profanity I know as I pass.
Lets take that crisp trip in our machines to the present.
I have forgotten of the incident alltogether.
Then I open AOL and see the top story: "Teen Can't Hold Flower in Yearbook". Apparantly some young woman wanted a rose in her yearbook photo and the company laid down the same 'no props' rule. Now, why the fuck does Melissa Morin, 17 of New Hampshire get a blown up photo and a featured story on AOL and I don't?
If my math corrects me, this happened to me first.
Blast you Melissa, you stole my story. You WILL pay.

P.S here is the article if yer' curious. Check out the kid with the boomstick.

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