Saturday, October 31, 2009

It's Back


Guess what I woke up with this morning? Did you guess hives and swollen lips? If so, you win. You are also strange.

I know that in the past few months I have gotten a bunch of new readers who might not know about this mysterious and disgusting medical condition I have. To clarify things I'll briefly explain it. To those of you who have heard me ramble about this hundreds of times or seen it first hand, feel free to skip ahead.

A few years ago I got reamed by probability and contracted Mono and Lyme Disease at the same time. As Elaine puts it in Seinfeld, "It's like Epstein-Bar but with a twist of Lyme". Replace "Epstein-Bar" with "Mono" and you have a perfect description of what I had.

The ordeal completely destroyed my immune system. I started to get hives and swollen lips all the time. Eventually it just became heat induced (take showers for example) which still puzzles me and doctors equally to this day.

After doing some medical testing the general assumption was that I have an immune deficiency that results in Idiopathic Urticaria. Don't bother Googling that, it means "Un-explainable hives" and it's disgusting. I get them because my immune system is allergic to itself. In other words, I take self loathing to a whole new level. I used to be creeped out and ashamed by it but now I don't really care. In fact, I made some good art out of it last year. Fun times.

Point is, I have been getting better and better. In fact, for the past few months it's rare I see a hive at all. The lips? Forget about it! I haven't looked like Stephen Tyler in over a year, maybe two. The illness had just become manageable and I went to the allergists office for hours this week essentially verifying that. Major score.

Of course, things can't be too easy for your pal, Kevin. The day after I spend my entire morning at the Doctor's I woke up with huge, swollen lips.

It happened again today. Worst. I have a critique and intended on wearing my Star Trek outfit. I didn't want to look like a total freak so I took an antihistamine and iced it.

From 5:00 in the morning to 7:30 I sat in my living room sucking on an ice pack. Go do that, if you are like me you will be shocked at how much fucking hurts.


My thoughts on this? I am trying to put it together but can't. All I can say is:

Fuck,
Shit,
Goddamnit,
Ohmyfuckinggodshitdamnitthissucks

Really pissed me off. Let's see what tomorrow morning is like. That could make or break me.

2 comments:

emx said...

Good thing you have that warm snuggly sweatshirt to wear at times like this.

LudwigLongPlay said...

my man, your posts have been on point. love u